Believe In Yourself!

In January this year, I attended an online book workshop. The faciliator, Carey Kingsbury, showed us how to write a book in 4 weeks. I was very nervous about getting started but I did write some stories to put in my little book, Dear Sophia, Love Yourself! I wrote the stories, had someone edit them (my grammar is atrocious), and I took the time to make lots of corrections. The editing part took longer than the original writing it! Some of the biggest problems were missing punctuation marks. I also write the way I talk which isn’t a good idea if you don’t talk correctly. I tend to use ethnic expressions. There were lots of grammatical errors. I was very on edge about it all. At times I just wanted to throw it all away because I simply couldn’t find ways to better express myself. However, the editor did offer suggestions to me which I’m very grateful for.
It was very important for me to write the book because it was part of my healing journey. Yet for many reasons, I made excuses to not approve the book for publishing. I sent my text in for approval on the createspace website for self publishing. There were problems with my margins and it was so frustrating. I hadn’t used a word processing software in years so I was very rusty on it it all. I was also not very good at working with templates. I finally ordered a proof of the book when I thought everything was okay but when it came, I realized I hadn’t fully justified the text, and the margins were still off!
Meanwhile, one of the other writers in the workshop published her book. It is a workbook called How To Believe In Yourself: A 7-Step Guide For Overcoming Fear And Self-Doubt by Carmen Parks. The book was very timely because I had serious doubts about my ability to publish my own book. I was uncertain about the cover, what I wrote and I even found out that I had accidentally left out one of the most important stories in the book. It’s the story called, “I’m Not Crazy!!” Gee, I was feeling very crazy about it all! I bought Carmen’s book and ended up attending one of her workshops. She very kindly walked me through the process of overcoming the fear. She also helped me to overcome any doubts about publishing my book. My own book is about learning to love myself and I needed it to help me do it! Hehehe.
The main point in all of this is to believe in yourself! Let go of fear and speak up for yourself. My husband helped me to fix the margins and I ended up publishing the book. However, it took me a while to actually tell anyone I did it! It’s so hard to put yourself out there. I was feeling very exposed. Yet I did it! That’s the most important part, I did it! I believed in me and my work. Now I’m here writing a couple of blogs! I remember, prior to publishing my book, Carmen told me, “This book can open doors that you never knew were out there.” It is so true. I have had many doors open for me, and it also helped me to come out of my shell, and let my light shine. I feel more free to openly share what I have been through, and have overcome. It’s liberating! Believe in yourself and all you want to accomplish. You never know what doors it may open for you! More coming up in the next entry.

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