Tag Archives: wisdom

Beauty of Hindsight

I don’t know how many times I have wondered, “Why did this happen to me?” I don’t know how many times I wondered why I was let go or dismissed. I thought I had done everything right and followed all the rules. I put my best foot forward, I was nice, polite, and “something else”! Yet things didn’t go as planned! What I’ve learned is many people learn their lessons in hindsight. After all, if I’d known a relationship wouldn’t pan out, maybe I never would have started it. If I had known the job wasn’t a good fit, I wouldn’t have tried it and left. Perhaps it was meant to go that way to teach me a lesson! Not many of us have the right perceptions in order to avoid seemingly “disastrous outcomes.” Yet, I believe all of these experiences are life lessons.

However, it usually takes a long time to learn the lesson when I’m resisting it. Like many years ago, I was very depressed and hurt at the way my life was going and the relationships not working out. I wondered what I had done wrong. I didn’t feel like I had done anything wrong. The more I pondered it, the more I wanted an answer, the more I stewed and couldn’t let it go. This is where the danger of falling into depression and being unable to cope comes in. Yes there were many other factors, but at the time I didn’t know how to just let go. I didn’t have the life skills, yet this exact situation was teaching them to me! Resisting, and insisting on answers caused me to lose the lesson until many years after I had finally moved on, and one day I had an “aha” moment of revelation!

I often ask myself now, when things seem to be going awry, “what is this situation trying to teach me?” Sometimes, it’s apparent and other times I need to wait. When I’m stuck in the middle of something, it’s hard to see where it’s going, and what I’m being taught. I’ve learned to be patient, compassionate, forgiving, and loving with myself so that I can continue to function and breathe without spiraling down. This in turn empowers me to give others patience, compassion, forgiveness, love and grace when they’re going through their own struggles. Once I figured out that I learn things in hindsight, I was able to love, forgive and move on.

Resistance slows the process! I had to learn to go with the flow! It takes patience, wisdom and trust in yourself, that you’re going to okay.  As I look back on my life, I see I have overcome so much, and I’m grateful for the beauty of hindsight!

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Flexibility

In the last few weeks, my son turned 18 years old, my daughter blessed me with a second grand-daughter, and I planned with my husband across the country away from my new little babe!  We’ve spent long hours planning this trip, on the road, trying to sleep, and enjoy myself.   Life is just frustrating at times!  I miss the kiddos back home, but we did Skype once.  There’s also the unreliable GPS, and at times nonexistent internet connection! Such a trip!  Prior to the internet, there were other frustrations like maybe we had the wrong map or we had no idea how far it was to the next town for a potty stop.  Times have changed drastically!

Even more so are my personal changes.  We all change at some point, for better or worse.  Some of us are moving forward, others are stagnant, and still others are going backwards.   That’s why it’s important to be flexible, go with the flow, take a breath, relax and keep your head up.  Don’t let these little nuances get you down!   Also, if take advantage of the precious moments, you never know what could happen just around the bend.  Here’s a really hard one I’ve had to learn, don’t stay stuck with the same information!  We get inundated with new information all of the time and sometimes it’s because an application gets updated, or new details are added!  It’s easy to get frustrated and say, “but I thought….”  It’s simply time to go with the flow and adjust your sails for the new information or I can ignore it, too, especially if it’s irrelevant!    That’s where your intuition needs to kick in.   Do you trust yourself to make the right choice? Be flexible to be wise!